You don’t know

In the midst of chaos and disorder, I find a quiet place;

That place is you.

You don’t know that and you probably never will.

Sometimes on a day where I feel I am swimming aimlessly in an ocean of confusion;

You are a lighthouse.

When I begin to fail in humility and start climbing on to my high horse of self-absorption and self-importance;

You remind me of who I really am and who I strive to be.

You don’t know that and you probably never will.

There are days when  I am filled with remorse and anguish and I spend all my time looking backward at  bygones that can’t be changed, that I don’t understand, filled with “what-if” and “why”, when I distort the memories and fail to realistically see the truth that I somehow want to transform into a lost perfection;

You call me to the present, to the moment and remind me I am not alone.

In times where I feel my frustration rising and the negativity around me and within  me threatens to swallow me whole and spit me out as a angry nasty troll, you fill me with quiet laughter, and hidden smiles and you compel me to catch sight of the magnificence  and beauty that can be found around me;

You don’t know that and you probably never will.

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About Christie Marie Ginja Kruger

Orenda (huron)The power of human will to change the world. Set up as an opposing force to fate or destiny. If powerful forces beyond your control are trying to force a particular outcomes, orenda is a kind of vocalised summoning of personal strength to change this. A giant child, trying to find my purpose, without losing sight of all things beautiful. View all posts by Christie Marie Ginja Kruger

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