A Love(ly) conversation

She looked at me with big round eyes and asked “have you ever been in love?”

My mind whirled backward delving in to the past,

“A few times.” I answered, and she looked at me intently and asked “but isn’t there supposed to be just one?”

I smiled and answered, “they were all the one at the time”.

“There was the first one, my first everything, my first love and my first heartbreak, and it tore me to shreds and I lost the self I hadn’t found yet;

Then there was the second one and he put a ring upon my finger and we were happy, ‘till we weren’t, he was the one that made me search for myself.

Then there was the one who loved me so much, he spent his time breaking me to fix me the way he wanted, and that didn’t work, and it broke and tore me to pieces, not so much because he broke my heart, but because I let him break my spirit, he was the one that taught me not to let go of the self I had found.

Then there was the one, oh the one…. the one who lifted me higher than I have ever been, and drove me crazy, and our relationship was on and off, and no matter how hard we tried to resist each other, we failed and kept coming back around to each other. He is still the one, but not for long. He is going away to find himself, and he has taught me that I can let go because I love him, that time together is about the present, not about the past and not about the future.”

She looked confused and scrunched her eyes and bit her lip, trying to stop the words that were bound to fall out. “but some people have just one love, don’t they?”

“Yes”, I replied, “they do, but I think I’m lucky for having a few ones”.

“What will you do when he goes away”? she asked cautiously.

“I will wait a while,” I said, realising the impact of the words to follow, “until he comes back, or until he doesn’t come back, and then, and then I think I may meet the last one.”

“Love sounds horrible,” she said twisting her teddy’s ear.

“It’s glorious,” I answered, “horribly glorious.” She nodded, said “okay” and put her hand over mine, and I smiled and wiped away a tear that had wandered down my cheek and I wished her a life time of love. © Christie Marie Kruger 2013

 

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About Christie Marie Ginja Kruger

Orenda (huron)The power of human will to change the world. Set up as an opposing force to fate or destiny. If powerful forces beyond your control are trying to force a particular outcomes, orenda is a kind of vocalised summoning of personal strength to change this. A giant child, trying to find my purpose, without losing sight of all things beautiful. View all posts by Christie Marie Ginja Kruger

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