Tag Archives: choice

Shadow girl

Shadow girl

She no longer sobbed uncontrollably. She had no energy for passionate tears, instead, at times, her tears would escape the padlocked box where emotions are kept and they would run down her face catching her by surprise.

It was that awkward stage of grief where hope still lingers. A place she knew she may never return from.

A shadow hiding in half light, waiting for the darkness to descend and yet hoping the sun would fail to sleep, just this one time.

Her head and heart in violent battle tearing each other apart like rabid dogs and all she could do was stand still. Helpless but not hopeless, alone.

Surrounded by someone else’s demons coaxing hers to come out and play.

So she stood not sure of up and down and left and right and in and out and everything kept spinning in silence around and she wished there was a soundtrack so she could figure out what was coming next.

At times the darkness began to drown her but a crack of light would filter through just enough to tease her into believing.

But the corner where she could be seen grew smaller, she watched herself being swallowed by the dark. This silent movie of the shadow girl.

Trapped in limbo between the night and the light fighting demons that were not her own.


Wondering and Wandering

In this moment

it has changed

my life

my journey

a path ne’er known to me

has shown itself

I cannot see but for a few steps ahead

but I know it is leading me

to the unknown

to the destination not planned

I am stumbling still keeping one eye on the path I have designed

wondering and wandering in a circle

confused by the fear of change

stomach knotted afraid of choice

wrong, right

sacrifice

 

questioning the purpose of life’s strange intervention

test or quest? I am unarmed and without compass

fate, fear, future, failure

faith

the winds of change are whispering

the unknown brambled path shown

breathe

let go

embrace

© Christie Marie Kruger

Image© Christie Marie Kruger


The idealist

Am I veiled

Beneath a practiced perfection

Am I hidden

Masked by your perception

Am I seen

As the being I am

Or as the world sees me

Am I heard

In what I articulate

Or as you desire to hear me

I am.

I am spirit.

I am essence.

I am worthy.

I choose.

I choose to love.

I choose to soar.

I choose to have faith.

I am the idealist that upsets your cup of hate and spite.

I am the lover that walks away from your fight.

I am the dreamer that doesn’t heed your shattering words.

I am the child that embraced a school of thought that fills me with harmony.© Christie Marie Kruger


Untitled 2006

As I pulled away and drifted, across my vision sea I felt the change in you; the same was not for me. I feel pain in joy such joy in pain; the human spirit sustains with the greater power to free others and bind yourself its a choice of selfless knowing of a never ending hollow that will be filled with naught I feel pain in your joy; joy in my pain; for freedom truly is a gift an ultimate sacrifice; for never are the rewards equal but one will suffer for another and so shall the world turn the balance is sustained by such and perhaps in time equality in freedom shall be gained by truth in translucent acceptance and open mindedness. © Christie Marie Kruger


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