Tag Archives: love

VOID

I feel like there is a part of me grieving

But I don’t know why

I feel like I have lost something

Maybe something I never had

I feel like there is a void that has grown inside me,

Yes that is it, a void has grown inside me, so maybe I haven’t lost something

Maybe I have found something I can never have

That knowledge growing inside me, a void…..

© Christie Marie Kruger

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Breathe

Breathe

Can you feel it?

Breathe

Life

Your life

Your soul

In that breath

See it in your mind’s eye

The “I”,

The “me”

It’s your life

The peace

The chaos

The disorder

The love

The anger

The tears

The laughter

Breathe

Till that last breath you take

Your life, your soul

Just breathe

© Christie Marie Kruger


Delusional Daydream

I thought he wrote my thoughts, as though he had travelled through my mind and collected the unexpressed and given a voice to that which I hid from the world.

 I felt he held a mirror up to me, and showed parts of myself I had long forgotten or buried.

 A sentence could reveal me, provoke me, empower me and reflect me.

 He wrote his thoughts, fears, emotion. From grief to joy, from anger to passion, or was he writing my thoughts, fears, emotion?

 Was he revealing himself or was I merely seeing myself in the mirrored reflection of his words?

 My imagination is gripped by a self serving insane desire, a wildly prejudiced delusion of wishful thinking;

that I know him. That I see his soul, that he knows me, the rawest parts of me, the deepest part of my essence and being.

 That there is an unwavering bond, an unearthly spiritual connection and a passionate intimacy of both body and mind and essence ….. all created in my imaginings of perfect possibility.

 That if I set aside all logic, and boundaries, I can, in my insanity, believe for just a moment or two that I am in the midst of something magical, destined, perfect and without constraint.

 And how safe it is here in my private imagined Nirvana. No fear allowed.

 For just a moment or two, a fleeting daydream of ignorant bliss, where it is just us, understanding each other, seeing each other, reveling in a garden of Eden where our minds and hearts are in harmony, knowing nothing other than sheer perfection of love and understanding, of serenity and passion. A soul connection, beyond human understanding.

 You may think I’m crazy, you may think I’m delusional, you are right, but it’s only for a moment or two. My fleeting blissful daydream of an impossibly flawless love not restricted by social expectation, or rational explanation, or fearful defense.

 Let me embrace the impossible…… for just a moment or two .  © Christie Marie Kruger


Hope

although content in heart and mind

in the fleeting moments

as slumber joins hand with wakefulness

the heart hopes

that somewhere, sometime

I will reach out and feel the warmth

and beating pulse of the person that I can call home. © Christie Marie Kruger


Kneel and weep

Kneel

kneel, not in prayer, but in grief,

in humility

in gratitude

kneel

kneel and be closer to the earth from whence you’ve come

kneel and weep

weep for all you have lost,

for all you have to let go,

for all your pain

weep

weep the tears of love and hate and anger and regret

kneel and weep in humility

kneel and look up at that which you normally look down to

kneel and weep

kneel and thank the universe for all life has handed you

kneel and weep

kneel and weep and bow down to your demons your hopes

your dreams fulfilled,

your visions shattered

your regrets that consume

your pain that tears

your anger that clouds

your idealism that shrouds

kneel and weep

and weep

let go.

© Christie Marie Kruger


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