I have never been here before

I haven’t been here before
And that frightens me
It is easier to be on unstable land and expect it to fall away from underneath you
It is easier to visit mistrust and have it proven and to balance on uncertainty of respect until you fall and you knew you would.
So I haven’t been here before; where I stand firm on solid ground of respect
Where the walls around me are plastered with honour and trust and not the prisons of insecurity and self-doubt
I have never known such a place where I am strong and supported at the same time
Where I am comforted but motivated to not get comfortable in mediocrity
I am challenged without malice, I am appreciated and not placed on a pedestal I cannot climb down from
I am in a place where I am safe in who I am, in my faults and my gifts
I trust, I honour, I love
I am trusted, honoured and loved
I have visited many places, and this is the first time I am home.

The time between

There are times when I am engulfed by a deep sadness and longing
For the time in between
The time in the middle of the spirals we have travelled to love each other
The time we lost figuring out
What we knew but were afraid of
There are times when I am engulfed by a deep sadness and longing
For the time ahead
The time ahead where I know I will let you go again and again
To let you live
Your life on your terms
I know what I love most about you is what will hurt me in the end